I Was a Professional Cake Eater (or, Giving Up)

Okay, I wasn't a professional cake eater. But I could down a few pieces of dense chocolate cake like a boss. It wasn't until middle school, when I started to be unable to stomach pure chocolate at 7A.M. that I started to lose my dessert-inhaling reputation, and since then, the giving up pattern has just spiraled out of control. Since fifth grade, I haven't stayed at the same school for more than two years. I quit piano after I played Kelly Clarkson's "Breakaway" so many times, it started to provoke my gag reflex. I have a googledocs full of un-finished stories for which I had big plans.

These big plans involved reading my stories to my pillow pet Ernest and my stuffed crab Phyrso.

I should just start calling this the "Jenna Marbles gif blog"

And being at the age where adults start to look at you funny when you stamp your foot and whine, "but I don't wanna!", I figured it would perhaps be good to actually stick with something. It's a great intention to have for a few hours. You sit down in front of your computer, fresh with fantastic ideas for the next great American novel, you write a few sentences, erase more sentences because they just don't have that writer-ly flow, then Tumblr happens.

It's a black hole, Tumblr.

But even though I'm still cursed with Attention Deficit "ooh shiny!", I've managed to stick with a few things. I've found it's important to prioritize what you actually want to get decently professional at, and what is "just for kicks."

Mine literally was just for kicks

When I quit dance classes, I didn't feel like I was giving up because I just wanted to do some twirls, have some fun, and obviously have an excuse to wear stage makeup. I didn't ever plan to become a professional dancer, and I still enjoy bursting out into dance in my room every single night occasionally.

But the occasional dance class isn't going to turn you into the next Martha Graham. So for those activities that you know you should stick with, here are some tips for not losing your mind while practicing that cat-screeching violin ten hours per week:

1) Create something.
We all know that playing Chopsticks on the keyboard over and over is basically your "get discouraged quick!" remedy. It's so basic it makes us wonder if our piano teacher sees us as pet monkeys. It's important to learn the basics, but it is easily discouraging when that's all you focus on. So learn a few chords, or dance moves, or ways not to burn yourself on a stove, and make something. You could write a totally stilted song and be waaaay off key, but it doesn't matter. If you have a piece that you could hypothetically share with the rest of the world, it gives you hope that you can create something a million times better once you've mastered the basics.

2) Look at your inspiration
Chances are, you took up your hobby because there was someone who'd mastered the craft who is just so cool.
If only Lindsey Stirling was a thing before we were five, right?
Looking at your favorite singer/songwriter/dancer/fruit impersonator will remind you of why you decided to get into these shinanigans in the first place, and what you can strive for. Looking at this role model isn't meant to be a "why couldn't I be this good?" type thing. Don't shoot yourself in the foot with the high-expectation gun.
We should ban all high-expectation guns.
I'm waiting for the Republican outcry.

...No? Okay, coast is clear.

When I wonder why in the hell I'm typing sentences onto a screen (other than for you, dear blog reader, did I mention you look marvelous today?), I read some Daniel Handler and Jodi Picoult. Perhaps a few Bryarly Bishop blogs if I'm in a blog-specific writer's block (never!). The passion for writing comes through in their works, and it's the kind of genre that I strive to be strong in.

And I've been channeling Daniel Handler since second grade, so something must be working.

3) Talk to someone.
Okay. Duh. Any advice-ish thing is going to tell you to talk to someone. But I don't mean like a therapist or your mom, or your cat. Talking to release your feelings, but what happens after you tell your cat that you feel like a failure?

"Mere mortal," he'll say, "figure it out in another life...oh wait, you only have one."

I mean that you should get some concrete advice from someone who was in the exact situation as you.

I know what you're thinking: "I accidentally put my underwear on my head this morning, my car ran out of gas on the highway, my jeans don't fit on Tuesdays, and I've been living off bananas and pop tarts for the past year and a half! Nobody in the world has been in the same situation!"

That is all true.

But if you're taking guitar, singing, pie eating, etc lessons, you'll probably have a teacher ("no shit"). That teacher is not just there to teach you the chords and that you cannot wack your history teacher on the head with your guitar; he is also there to talk to you, to give you advice. Because this master was also once at a point where he wanted to give up. Who else is more qualified to tell you how to push through something?

4) Eat a piece of chocolate.
This helps everything.

Namaste.