Day 5: Sun Salutations

I took a break from Adriene's series to venture out into the world and go to Lila Yoga, one of my favorite places in State College. While it's still daunting to do even the most basic of tasks (see: driving), I've found that once I've completed said task, I think, "hey, that was easier than I expected it to be," and find the reward to be much more present than the fear.

I was the only student in class, with a teacher I didn't recognize (it turns out when you leave town for two years, things aren't exactly the same when you return—a shock!). Already feeling uncomfortable by these two factors, I almost retreated home when I realized I'd worn my pants inside out. But, rather than tuck my head in shame, I offered myself some gentle compassion, slid over to the bathroom to correct the pants error, and folded myself into child's pose.

The instructor, Denise, began with some musings about repetition, that we as humans crave routine. We watch the same movies and TV shows, read the same books, listen to the same music. We like knowing the beginning, middle, and end. There is a comfort in knowing what to expect. Part of what makes sun salutations so appealing is that they are the exact same sequence every time. We know we won't be asked to fold ourselves into pretzels, nor will we watch other people doing scorpion pose, only to feel inadequate and ashamed. It's predictable. It's easy.

https://www.yogaclassplan.com/yoga-pose/scorpion-pose/

I can relate to this addiction to routine, as I spent most of my life doing the exact same things—namely burying myself under a blanket and writing, freaking out about the future, being terrified of leaving the house, and worrying about what either people thought of me. While there was the occasional adventure, I would quickly scurry back home, glad to have gotten my "character building" out of the way.

https://www.reddit.com/r/me_irl/comments/5jj51z/me_irl/

That's not to say there aren't benefits of routine—especially a positive routine like starting the day by saluting the sun. The complementary nature of the 3 "padas," earth, water, and fire, help maintain balance and exploration. It invites a sense of grounding, ease, and passion both on and off the mat. Sun salutations have encouraged me to express each element in some capacity.

Yoga encourages its practitioners to live intentionally. So, one of my mini goals (as I've avoided setting hugely ambitious, unobtainable goals) is to consciously practice each pada throughout my day. When I feel inclined to worry, I may invite some ease by lighting a candle. When I'm feeling lethargic and unmotivated, I may invite some fire by dancing, going for a walk, or running. Okay, the latter may be an ambitious, unobtainable goal.

But in living intentionally, I have to acknowledge that the "transformation" Adriene brought up in day 3 means making some significant changes. Even though getting out of the house is a change from how I've behaved in the past month, tending towards the same practice is a lifetime-ingrained behavior.

So perhaps it's time for an all levels class, where I let go of expectations. Chances are I'll shrug and go "hey, that wasn't so bad."

Namaste.